The presence of a child does not immediately resolve any emotional issue your wife may have for skipping pregnancy. Knowing what challenges come with her pursuit of motherhood makes it easier for you to be a good father and husband to your family.
No Classes for Expecting Parents
You and your wife may be expecting a child, but not in a traditional sense. This means a big X mark has just appeared on the door of the usual baby basics classes she had been eyeing. Even if they do allow adopting parents into the class, the experience might end up more awkward than helpful.
Taking the initiative to cooperate with baby placement agencies and hospitals to find suitable classes for you spares her from false notions of being an outcast. She may not be pregnant, but her emotional health would still influence the baby greatly.
No Breastfeeding for Her
Instincts make it natural for women to want to breastfeed their child. While adoptive mothers can nurse, not every woman proves responsive to methods of lactation. The possibility of failure makes this an even more sensitive matter for your wife.
With your support in searching for a method that works best for her, she would find the courage to adjust her expectations and deal with the innocent – and most probably hurtful – questions of both acquaintances and strangers.
No Chronological Order
Your means of announcing and celebrating the newest member of your family will be different from what you imagined. Couples who get to claim parental rights to a newborn baby might find it easier to plan baby showers, visits to the doctor, and shopping. For others, however, their first glimpse of their adopted child can happen 13 to 15 months after birth.
Don’t be discouraged if this turns out to be the case with your family. A lack of predictability hardly removes the fun of hosting celebrations to welcome your baby. Picking out party materials may not be your strongest point, but your effort would mean a lot to your wife. Your optimism as head of the family gives her a reason to believe in a future as good as if you had your own child.
As patriarch, you hold the responsibility of ensuring the security and happiness of your family, regardless of the circumstances that surrounds its formation. The best means to accomplish that security rests in your ability to support your wife.